what's the difference between a black man and a bench? the bench is an inanimate object

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

A boy with red hair is happy.

Do knock-knock jokes apply to homeless people?

Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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