What does the gay man do while he is taking a shower with many other men in a prison or a gym? Lathers soap all over his body to clean himself so he is not smelly.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road It was being dragged to the other side by fox It's the way of life _._._

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Okay, this is a real joke: A guy slips on a banana and falls down in the most funny way ever, so a girl nearby starts laughing when she suddenly realizes the guy is bleeding profoundly, so she runs over to help, but it turns out the blood was just ketchup so... Just then they both got run over and killed by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What's the difference between Osama's death and Paris Hilton's bra? A: One is Osama's death and the other is Paris Hilton's bra.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The Dane, the Norwegian and the Chinese where on a plane, and as the plane was malfunctioning, the pilot would shout: "We are overloaded! Toss out everything you can spare!" The Dane tossed out a box of Danish Salami, explaining they had enough of those in his country. The Norwegian tossed out a package of sweaters, explaining that they had enough of those in his country. Suddenly the Chinese jumped out without a given explanation, as time passed though, the surviving crew arrived to some conclusions... Moral: R.I.P Kim the 294834839483948th

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the Orange say to the Apple? Nothing. Both of them are lifeless objects, thus lacking the ability to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There was a man posting an anti-joke... He had no life

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the boy dog say to the girl dog? Ruff

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was six afraid of seven? 7 is greater than 6. Didn't you learn about number lines in 3rd grade?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead got into a street fight. who won? The redhead because she had a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops