Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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how did a white girl have a black baby? she was raped at the age of thirteen.

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Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

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What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

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why did the walrus sex with the jew because 911 created a sexual falafel

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whats the difference between a phone and Helen Keller? you listen to the phone and you smash Helen Keller on the head with a spiked baseball bat

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Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

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so a huge calculator walks into a bar, and a man steps out from behind it, and wipes his forehead.

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a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

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What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

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a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Yo mama so poor, she can't afford luxuries

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why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

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What did casey anthony say when the ruled her as not guilty? "yay"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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