There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

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What happened when the Hispanic man dropped his Wollet? He picked it up

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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When life throws lemons at you, just give up and commit suicide!

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? No one... you have no friends.

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What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because skeletons cannot live on their own and there is no such thing as a skeleton that can walk across roads without muscles.

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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Why did Billy start a fire? Because he was cold.

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What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

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Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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What's worse than finding a baby in a dumpster? Being late on your taxes

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what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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what did the African kid get for his birthday AIDS

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What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops