What do you call four black people in a car? A family road trip.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Harriet Tubman have to take the underground railroad? Because she was a fugly slut.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why was their a child on the sun? There wasn't he would be incinerated

thumb_up thumb_down -13

three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There is a newly wed couple, a biker and his biker lady friends. The newly wed man says to his wife, "Pass the honey, honey". One of the biker chicks looks over. Five minutes later the man says to his wife, "Pass the sugar, sugar". They biker chick looks back at them and then asks the biker man, "Why don't you treat us like that?" " You know your right. Pass the bacon... lovely". And from that day on the bikers lived in peace and harmony.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. Who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why shouldn't gingers smoke before they are 3? Because they have souls and still abide by the same rules!........................................................................................................................................ If you laughed at that you either don't like gingers or should be shot. And by the way... Why did Snape kill Dumbledore? Because he had to.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many jews can you fit in a car? It depends on how many seats there are, but some could double-buckle and stuff like that to fit more if necessary.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: There was a train wreck in the middle of nowhere, every one died, no one saw the train wreck, so how did the story about the wreck get out? A:Many philosophers believe that the universe is a figment of its own imagination. Therefore, if "the universe" decided that it wanted the story to get out, it could have just made it so since it is its own imagination.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man goes into a bar and gets drunk. He realizes that he is too drunk to drive and calls a cab to bring him home.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The awkward moment when you don't know whether to like or dislike this because you think I want like so you are gonna dislike but what If I want dislikes, but what if I want likes, you are confused Antijokeception....

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the (real) wrestler say to the U.F.C guy? Probably something nice because most U.F.C fighters were wrestlers.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the little girl drop her teddy bear? Because she was being sexually molested. Why did the little Jewish girl drop her teddy bear? Because gas came out of the shower-head.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Did you see my sandwitch? No. I am your sandwitch, and therefore no one thought to put me up to a mirror. Would you like me to? No. I have no eyes. And why are you talking to a sandwitch??? ...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Lady, calm down, you are missing out on the details here. We knew he was selling information as "The Wiz", from there on it was no problem tracking him down, but having us track him down at the core of Point Zero, would have dragged you all down with him, he was into sharing not only precious Intel, but also some sick shit, nobody is going to mourn him, and neither should you. We sent him a tip so he would get to some location where he would still be able to bypass the lockdown (easy to assume a little geek knows how to manage this), but a small anonymous tip would never have been enough to make him run for it, the next part was to make sure the info on his anonymous message, begin to come true. Sorry about the rest, I needed to know what position he had among "the Order", and he was shot down by a sniper, he knew too much, his involvement, and abilities as both a liar and a traitor, could easily have made it so he would have lied the blame on you, so he could have gone free. And believe me, this happens a lot, and is probably what happened to the old underground as well, think about it, you begin selling some dirty info videos, pictures of things nobody should see in the name of some "organization" (I have no idea what you call your thing, and it is best you never tell me). Then what is left? You claim the entire organization you work for, are the ones responsible for your dirty work, you tell your captors, and you go home rewarded with freedom taking the whole organization down with you, when in this case, the one that would have gone free, would have been the only one to blame. I know what the rest of you are doing, I mean I was part of its foundation years ago, and there is nothing illegal about it, yet people such as the feds would as they did, have brought the whole place down again, and as they had nothing to accuse us for back then other than "we do not like this", they never shared this to the mainstream media. Cant have that happening again, no matter the cost, and if you ask me, some small geek pedophile selling bullshit, should not blame you all, but die, that is justice. It was not "nice knowing me", we will meet again, I mean it, even if I have to get your cell number on "gray terms", you might not like it, but I will call you, on friendly terms of course. The setup is finished, got to go, cant sit here typing on my laptop anymore, gotta get back to the office.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

PerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerú

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops