so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man is at a party. He gets hungry so he waits in the foodline and then he gets some food. Then he has to go to the bathroom so he waits in the bathroomline and goes to the bathroom. Then he is thirsty so he goes to get some punch and realizes that there is no punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

You wanna hear a joke? Me too

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats worse than worldwarII world war iii

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's red, fast, and flies through the air? A tomato in a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops