A man walked into a house, He never came back out as he fell down the stairs and snapped his neck, His family mourn him everyday.

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what would Jesus do? Get crucified and die.

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When life gives you lemons, you make grape juice and let the world wonder how you made it.

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

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Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

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How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a pineapple is not a proper home

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SBB

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knock knock? come in

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A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

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Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

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1+1=2

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

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America. A land where if a girl sexual harrasses a guy would be a good thing.

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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