Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 was having illicit sexual relationships with 9, of which 6 knew about, but was afraid to inform his wife, 8, who 7 stepped over to get to 9.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

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A man and his dog walk into the park, the man grabs a ball and chucks it for the dog. The dog can not chase after the ball because he has no legs and bites his owners leg.

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What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

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What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

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How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

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my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

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What is funnier then a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I forgot the rest, Don't laugh at me...

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WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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Have you heartd about the blond that confused winow putty for KY jelly? Her windows fell out.

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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How did the black man get a car? He bought it.

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What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

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Who invented apple? God

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Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

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Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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