What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A Christian asks God why there is so much pain and suffering in the world. Everyone around him moves away from the grown man talking to his imaginary friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

regoereiorgiorehgijreirehrfjirgjirejgruirehgrghehiiehaoiwpo;lkswpokewqoifgoieqjgiubtfoewfiir K.O

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did he cat not land on its feet? it had 2 legs amputated due to cancer and animal abuse

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:Why did the man fall down the stairs? A:Because someone pushed him down.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get mowed down by a tractor

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yeah, me too. The car just ran straight through the stoplight and it was all over...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your momma so fat when she went to the beach she was to self concious and left her shirt on.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Tyler: Why'd the monkey fall out of a tree? Donnie: who's there Tyler: dude this isn't a knock knock joke...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man had two horses. One was black and one was white. He cut the tail of one of them to tell them apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's Green and invisible? This cabbage --------------------------->>>>>

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops