What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down

what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? RAPED.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: Why did the duck eat some grass? A: because we are so careless that we caused global causing the entire pond to shrink to a size where it cannot raise a family and the fish could not prosper so the duck could not eat what it had forcing it do consume an inedible substence causing it to die because is not a natural part of a ducks diet

thumb_up thumb_down

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down

A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

thumb_up thumb_down

there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down

What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

thumb_up thumb_down

what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

thumb_up thumb_down

how do you complete an exam. dont be kaizen.

thumb_up thumb_down

whats the difference between a black man and a terd ? one is a black man the other is a terd

thumb_up thumb_down

why did simran go to jessicas house? To go have a human taco

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was baby Johnny crying because a monkey came and ripped of his dick

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

thumb_up thumb_down

A guy walks into a bar. He loses conciseness because of the force of the metal bar hitting his skull.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

thumb_up thumb_down

Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

thumb_up thumb_down

A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

thumb_up thumb_down

If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops