What did the bird say when he was riding the turtle? Weeee...

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Laura Pratz... not having a strong urge to tweet everything that happens in her life.

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what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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how many terminaly ill 5 year old cancer patients does it take to burn to supply enough energy to make toast just 4.5 :)

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A man walked into a bar. That hurt.

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One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

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How do you piss off a blind person? Tell him to piss in a round room.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, whereas Michael Jackson was a singer.

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Why was the black child found dead in water? He was raped and thrown into a river.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree, because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree, becuase it was dead. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree, because he thought it was a game!

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Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

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whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney? The statue doesn't change its position.

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Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? They do. In fact, seagulls can be found near almost any body of water.

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? It didn't. Anyone who would believe that is a complete moron.

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2 men walk into a bar without thier shirts. They get kicked out. 2 women walk into a bar without thier shirts They got beaten almost to death Why? The men dressed up as women, and every hated them so much they beat the almost to death when 2 cops walk into that bar, see the men dressed up as women and they too beat them. Little do they all know that the men disguised as women are really secret goverment agents looking into a drug deal. The drug dealers got away and now we have 2 people sueing the police department and drugs on the street again. Oh yeah I almost forgot: I made this up so if you read it you're going to die withing the next 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 years. I gurantee it. If you dont the men in white coats are going to do extremely painful tests on you and you just might die so then no one will care and maybe get onto thier lives again. Why did I right this? It hasnt happened to me so I dont know If you tell me I will give you something more valueble than gold. Want to know what it is? TELL ME FIRST!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know either, i'm just wondering why a chicken is trying to cross the road!

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How many dead bodies does it take to fill up a bathtub? Wellll.......... It depends on how big the bathtub is.

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How do you fit 100 dead babies into a box? Put them into a blender.

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops