How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

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What is white And taste like sheep A sheep

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. That always nice, you dont want your dairy products to spoil.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she is in rehab and will unlikely get over her mental illness leading to her soon and fatal death.

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an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're adopted and Santa Claus isn't real

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Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

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my egg roll

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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What is worse than a case of the flu? Finding a dead camel on the highway with a half eaten lollipop in its mouth.

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What do you give hobos? Febreeze

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Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

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What did the transvestite hooker say when he/she saw a robot fighting a dinosaur? That's strange.

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Logan's gay

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Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

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I? Everett

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Q: What do you call men at sea? A: Sailors

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Whats the difference between cake and dead babies? Cakes make people happy while dead babies are a sad and disturbing sight to see.

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I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

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Why couldn't little Timmy turn in his homework? Because on the way to school little Timmy was hit by a bus

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Why is 3 less than 4? To get to the other side

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops