A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

Why did Jimmy miss a question on his test? He put D

What is blue and smells like the sea The ocean

What's white and yellow with red all over? Vietnam War

Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

What's worse then your mouse running away? Getting hit by a plane

Your mom is so poor that she can't even pay attention.

Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

Where's the soap?

Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

What's faster than a black man carrying your TV? The law enforcement that promptly catches him and is about to charges him with theft regardless of his ethnicity because stealing someone else's property is just generally an unlawful thing to do.

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

My dad said that if I post anymore jokes on this website, the will hit my head against the keyboaaskdnaji;nsd;asdnasd;

Why are ther so many black people in the NBA? Because culturally Basketball is a very popular sport among a lot of African Americans, thus providing a lot of African Amercans to play Basketball professionally

Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue U suck Dick Just Like Ur Dad did to u

Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

A black guy walks into a KKK meeting. He is burnt on a cross outside his families house. They will mourn his death for years to come

Do you want to hear a shit joke? Stuart.

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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