Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

Why did Dean Jones talk to his car? Because it was Herbie the love bug , a car possessed by a demon that had voice recognition capabilities and thus could understand him

- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

What's wanted by none, wanted by one, and is worse than Terran Hansen? Brooke Colbert. Go you Jesse.

what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

The king asked the jester why was he not telling jokes. He wasn't because he's a jester and therefore is obligated to be funny.

Hello.

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, All you HATERS of Bieber, Go sick your mother.

What's the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck; the other regrets having you as a child.

i lyk 2 eet pup

Knock Knock *opens the door*

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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