Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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(A man in a dark van pulls up)... Hey kids can you come help me find my puppy? The kids get in the car and they find the puppy in a near by park. The kids are then safely returned home.

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What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

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What's white and hides in a tree. A refrigerator.

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An ant walks into a bar. Nobody Notices...

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Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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Asians

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers!

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what did the women with no arms and legs say to her daughter? go to your room.

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What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

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What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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How many jews can you fit in a car? It depends on how many seats there are, but some could double-buckle and stuff like that to fit more if necessary.

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A man walks into a bar gets hurt and falls over

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops