What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

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What happened the homeless guy's home? A meteor fell on it.

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Nickleback.

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knock knock who's there? Orange Oranges cant talk, so seriously, who's there Your mother Ha ha real funny -mother opens door with her key-

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I going to the kitchen to make a #sandwich.....oh wait this isn't twitter

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Sammi suck kyles chode

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I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

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yo mama is so fat that wii fit puts her in the overweight category

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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What goes 100 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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What did Osama Bin-Laden say on 9/11? JENGA!!!!

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How did the dinosaurs die???? How the Heck do I kno?

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Why didn't children go to their grandma at summer? Cause, they were hit by a car earlier that year and they are dead.

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what's a fish with no eyes and out of water? its just a fish

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Can everyone please stop posting shit about my girlfriend because it seriously isnt cool.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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BIble verses: (secret bible code breaker edition) 90.01: Might thy level of power rise above the scouter of Vegebles 3.14: Thy shall make use of pee 6:9 Oral interaction is good for thee. 9:6: Peter said, lordeth this is no good, then the lordet said, try 6:9 and all was good. 6.66 Calleth upon this number on thy cell to speak with the beast. 9:11 This number shall aid you when in danger if thy have a cell, but not against the fallen by and Al Caida. 8:00 Call upon thy cellphone at no cost. 5.99 Thy use of plays of station three, areth too expensive... Whoops! Amen and RIIIIIIIIIIDGE RACER! 50:50 Thy shall share equally. 6:19: Thy shall use thy wrestling moves well. 20:00 Thy shall noth uset this windows version as it sucketh.' 88:88 Thy shall create four equal snowmen for me. 12.34 Read this and thy shall learn to count til four. 7:77 The number of the luck. X:B0X: It sucketh hard. 3:60 it sucketh far more than the original 9:99 Is the number to defeateth the beast while he is resting upside down 0:13 "and samuel said, but oh lord, I am a teen now!" And the lord agreed and all was good. Ok, I got to decode my bible further, yes indeed!

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Why did the woman cross the road? To welcome the new neighbors.

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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What do you call a fish with no fins? Dead.

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what did the dead man say to the other dead man ...nothing he's dead.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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