Barack Obama, Joe Biden, and the Devil all walk into a bar. Biden and Obama order a couple of beers and begin quietly conversing, while their security detail stands next to them. "The Devil" is actually a heavily tattooed performance artist, who in 1999 legally changed his name from Jim Larson. He has just gotten off work at his day job (a paralegal at a medium-sized firm), and is relaxing with a Johnnie Walker at the bar. Although he notices the president and vice president nearby, he has seen many politicians during his time working in DC, and so hardly pays attention.

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How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

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What's long, hard, and black, and goes into wet things? A submarine.

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Why did the ginger cross the road? To tell the police that her family had been taken hostage.

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What's the difference between jokes and anti-jokes? Anti-jokes aren't funny.

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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What's worse than having two girlfriends at once? Seven. Seven girlfriends.

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A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

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A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

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Fart

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

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How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

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Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend? My girlfriend is alive and 19 years older.

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What do you call an Amerindian who finished medical school? A doctor.

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David Cameron

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How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

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What happen to the girl that received chocolate on Valentine's day? She had a allergic reaction.

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? I throw a refrigerator at him.

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Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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