What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were it belongs.

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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what did the guy say to the other guy? nothing because right before he was going to say something he was hit by a truck and got knocked out for 11 hours and right before he was going to wake a plane crashed into the hospital and everybody died except for two gay guys.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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What did the mentally challenged kid get on his test? Drool

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What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

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Are you from Jamaica? 'Cause you're making me crazy! Are you from Haiti? I'm really sorry about all the disaster that's been happening there.

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Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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What did the boy say to his friend? "Hello!"

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Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

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your life

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Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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How many spiders dose it take to cover a wall? Four, if they are 7 feet tall

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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What's the same about a crouton and a pencil case? Both are used for dirty things, such as shoe tying.

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad ill be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!!

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where does a person with one leg work? anywere

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Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

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What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops