A man walks into a bar and the barenter says, "What'll it be?" The man says, "I'll take a Bud Light."

What do you call a fridge? A Fridge

what starts with P and ends with u-b-e-s? Paul, can you brang me some priangles and the rest of my Rubik's cubes?

Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

Roses are red Violets are blue Wrong. Violets should be purple.

how come bob felt 'under pressure'? because somebody dropped a dumpster on him

Why do black people have a bad reputation? Because they do bad things.

Obama

your skull would make a nice pen holder

That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

yo mamma is so fat when people look at her they say "you're fat"

Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

How many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Let's go ride our bikes!

What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

How do you feed 1000 people? Cook 1000 meals .

Q:What's the difference between my refrigerator and the trunk of my car? A: There isn't a spare tire in my refrigerator.

In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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