What did the girl say when she got her period? Nothing, why would she want anyone to know?

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a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

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you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

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What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

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This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

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What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

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Why did the man scream? because he was run over.

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Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

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Whats In My Trash? Bears

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

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A girl and her friend got into a fight. They both bled to death.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

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You know what the Germans have to say about problems? For every problem there is a final solution.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops