What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

I forgot what came after: Roses are Red Violets are Blue Too much anti jokes

more chocolate?

A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

How come Billy can only swim in circles? His right arm and right leg were amputated because he scraped his left arm.

Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

How do you wake Lady Gaga up? You poke-er--face....pokerface.

Keanu Reaves

What two states don't have running water? Solid and gas

What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

Why was the homeless man lying on the floor? Because he was dead

What comes after 69? 70

What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Cruchie.

Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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