What comes after 69? 70

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q:What would strawberry short cake never say? A: Very

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's black, white and red and can't turn round in corridors? A nun with a spear through her head

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Jayden Eccles

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the white bartender kick out a black man and his Mexican friend out of the bar? It was closing time

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Michael Jackson's favorite places: Toystore Candy shop Playground Amusment parks Kindergarden classroom Orphanige

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you do on Mother's Day? This is not a joke, I don't know what to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as the bar was made of metal and the man made forceful contact with the bar which resulted him in saying ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How much cocain did Charlie sheen do? Enough to kill 2 and a half men

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I forgot the rest, Don't laugh at me...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

an englishman,scotsman,and irishman walk into a bar the englishman says " a pint of lager please" "that will be 10pounds , says the barman "Im not paying that , ill see you in court" says the englishman . The same thing happens , in turn to the scotsman, and irishman ,and a summons is issued. In court the jugde says "why are you charging drinks too dear?" the barman says "im not, im selling them to a englishman ,scotsman, and a irishman..

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What starts with F and ends in U C K? firetruck What starts with P and ends in O R N? popcorn What only costs 5 cents on weekends? your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are gold Violets are blue I am color blind

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops