did you hear the joke about the lobster and the clownfish? no.. oh.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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what did the judgmental teacher say to a challenged student? your stupid

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Im batman...suck it losers

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how do women get from the kitchen to the bedroom? they walk there.

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Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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Why do migets laught when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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Why did Superman cross the road? I dunno.

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One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

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How do dogs mark their territory? With legal documents.

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Why the FFUUU did you go back? Because I broke something huur.

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Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

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My girlfriend gave me her first ever blowjob last night. I came in her mouth and she washed it down with a can of Carling. Obviously she had to get that horrible taste out of her mouth, so she gave me another blowjob.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

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What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

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I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

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What happens when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Absolutely nothing. The two belong to entirely different animal families and their reproductive abilities are totally incompatible. A kangaroo could never fertilize an elephant, or vice versa. To suggest anything else is unrealistic and a physical impossibility.

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

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What did the barber say to Chewbacca? DAAAAAAYYYYUUUUMMMM!!!

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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