What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is White on Top and Black on bottom? Micheal Jackson.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the special ed kid get on his iq test? drool

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the little girl who's parents died in a car accident get you her birthday? Foster Parents

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Girl: How do I know if I'm Jewish? Guy: Are you Jewish? Girl: No. Guy: There ya go.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a Mexican and a bench is a bench.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many jews can you fit in a car? It depends on how many seats there are, but some could double-buckle and stuff like that to fit more if necessary.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I like my coffee like I like my women. Ground up and in the freezer

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your moms so fat, she needed repruductive surgury.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Ed Rambo. EXPERIENCE as John Rambo is kidnapped by AL QUAIDA (because he did not totally save their ass in the second or third movie riiiight) Leaving Ed Rambo, his son (Played by Eddie Murphy) up to the task of saving him, from Al Quaida`s real leader... Yes, its a conspiracy! "Okay, first Obama is supposedly a terrorist, but seriously the secret alliance between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton?" Bullshit movie reviews. "So the explanation is that Ed Rambo is black because John Rambo married an Asian woman? What about their age? They are probably the same or something!" Mad Magazine. Moral: Yeah because this annoys you, and you all kinda love me I know its Al Qaeda, but who wants to type that... Now it does not say Skynet is watching anymore... After four times... Wow, god damn we need robocop to be real before the Termitetrisnators travel back in time into our dimension. AND NOT ADAM SANDLERS: ROBOCOP.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What kind of condoms do cows use? None.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops