What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

Q. Where do you find Indonesia A. On a map

Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

Q:Why did the boy cry? A: because his mom was hit by a bus Q: why did the boy wipe his face? A:he was covered in his mother blood and threatened all the witness who saw him push his mother into the bus

Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?

have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

Q:What do African American men call the Internet? A:The Internet

What do you call a 400 pound man eating chocolate? diabetic

ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

I'm wet Ew you perv.. Stop thinking like that ! I just took a shower.

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

How many black ppm does it take to screw in a light bulb All of them, plus 1 white guy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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