How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

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1Q: Quick! Ask me if I'm a lemon!! 2A: Your not a lemon 1A: :/ oh :/

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Q:why did the lion eat the zebra? A: because it was hungry.

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Whats Do You call people, on the top floor of a Double-Decker bus? Passengers

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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how do you start a stamped in mexico roll a nickle down the street sad thing is you just lost a nickle

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so a mom is like so what you want hunny and the dad goes like you baby bahahahahaa get it?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the grass is always greener on the other side.

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A: What Santa said when he caught Mrs. Claus with one of his elves... Q: What is "Ho ho ho?"

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What rhymes with milk...milf

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What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

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One day a mans computer was unusually, when all else failed, he had to go to extreme measures. He then refreshed his page.

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What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

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A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

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Knock, Knock. Who's there Hey, it's Dave. Oh well come on in.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Why did the boy eat the apple. He really likes apples.

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

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when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

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Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

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A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rape them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rape him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rape him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops