What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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Why did little Lisa fall off the swings? She had no arms

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dyslexics of the world untie!

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Waiter. there's a fly in my soup! I apologize, I'll bring you a new one immediately.

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Bob dole

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Q: why was the girl so dumb A: her teacher was a blond

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Q: What do you call a black guy with his degree in dentistry? A: Doctor

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What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

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whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

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Why weren't there any black people at the book sale? Black people don't read.

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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once upon a time y o u m a d BIBIBIDYYEAHBIIBAIDYEAH THAT'S ALL FOLKS

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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what is so fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? There is a high possibility their breasts have developed, thus equaling more pleasure for you.

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How do you get your girlfriend's yapping Chihuahua to be quiet? Throw it through a window.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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What did the bird say when he was riding the turtle? Weeee...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops