What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A black man walks into a bar. He sits down and has a couple drinks. When he is finished, he generously tips the bartender and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats purple and savage? Barney!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats funnier than the Holocaust? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do u call a black man in the middle of a crowd of white men? A rare sighting of a black man trying to go to colledge.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the amputee get for Christmas? Shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Puerto Rican, a Blonde, and an African woman in a taxi cab? Three people who happen to be traveling to the same location at the same point in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two black men go inside a movie theater. They sit down and watch the movie.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realizing on your deathbed that you regret the life you've lived and hate the person you've become.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock, knock. come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mom's so old she sometimes uses outdated racial slurs loudly in public. It can get pretty embarrassing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops