What's black can run really fast and jump really high? A panther

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the guy say to the blonde? "You're a blonde."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

42, that is all

thumb_up thumb_down -7

hiya

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

thumb_up thumb_down -7

want to hear a dirty joke tommy fell in the mud a clean joke he took a bath with bubbles bubbles was his neighbor

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is red white and blue Blood. I was lying about the white and blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman notices this rather humorous cliche and proceeds to point it out, laughs are shared by all.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If you walked into a grocery store right in the middle of Cuba what won't you see? The missing Malaysian MH370 Boeing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the rabbit jump? Because that's what rabbits do.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the black man drown? Because he grew up in a poor neighborhood, where no one had a pool, and so he never learned how to swim

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the slut have white stuff on her mouth? Because she just ate ice-cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why couldn't little Sarah smell the roses? Her face was mauled by a grizzly bear

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses only the finest ingredients.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops