How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how do you fix a family? Someone gives in

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Religious fanatics: WE MUST NOT SIN! Jesus: And I died for their sins? They do not even try a bit of sex and rock and roll? Now that is a sin :( I died for nothing then :( Religious fanatics: Damn!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a man who has Alzheimer's? Wait what am I doing?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did the mushroom say to the other mushroom? nothing, mushrooms can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down

Doctor: I bring grave news. Your wife is dying. She won't survive for another 100 years. Concerned and anguished Husband: Oh... that's ok! Doctor: Oh did I say years? I meant days! Oh the mirth! *The doctor breaks down into hysterical laughter, which the Concerned and Anguished Husband is furious to see, as the Doctor is taking delight out of such a grave situation.

thumb_up thumb_down

You know what they say... Big feet Lawn-mower

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down

You shouldn't have expectations. They make ex out of pect and tations.

thumb_up thumb_down

A. Knock Knock. B. Who's there? A. Orange. B. Orange who? A. Orange you glad your retarded because you think oranges can talk?

thumb_up thumb_down

Jesus Christ dude. Wait, aren't you Jewish?

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats wrong with that Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down

I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why is the duck? Because it has two feet the same.

thumb_up thumb_down

what do you get when you cross a scotsman who doe'snt know anything about football,and a indian who doe'snt anything about football .blackburn rovers , and a good night out.

thumb_up thumb_down

Dad, they tell me I am a slowpoke at school, what can I do? ... Eh son, this is mommy, your dad died ten years ago remember?

thumb_up thumb_down

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down

How long did it take azaha to have a shit? Nine months

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops