Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What’s brown and hairy? Brown hair.

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

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A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

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My cat just died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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