Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

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Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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