Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

I am a mime

One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

Whats brown and smells bad poo

why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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