- Anti Joke

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

A coyote walks into a bar, because human development has rapidly destroyed his natural habitat. He mauls three patrons.

A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

Why do people where saggy pants that don't fit? They can't afford too buy new

Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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