Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

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How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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If you come to Anti-Joke.com to look at the Newest jokes please leave a comment. Thank you!

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What did the monkey say to the other monkey Monkey can't talk

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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When would you find a Mexican, Asian, Black and white guy hanging out? Never

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Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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What do black people and tornadoes have in common? - It only takes one to destroy a neighborhood.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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What's brown and furry on the outside, soft moist and tastes good on the inside, begins with "C" and ends with "T", and has a "U" and an "N" in it? A coconut.

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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In Soviet Russia, there was a population of approx. 293,047,571 people. It was dissolved in 1991, it is now know as Russia or the Russian Federation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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