Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

thumb_up thumb_down -32

whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

thumb_up thumb_down -32

prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

one morning i turned on my tv

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

thumb_up thumb_down -34

how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Two Black Males walk into a bar. A white old lady leaves cautiously. Everyone else stays and has a great time with them as they are actually two very good guys, and funny too.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

thumb_up thumb_down -34

what did the orange say to the apple? hi

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops