Why is Harry Potter fake Because its a movie

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

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Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

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what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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Whats black, white, and Asian all at the same time? A panda

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What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why'd he fall off again? Because we put him back on.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

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A Muslim man walks away from a populated area leaving his briefcase behind. After a few minutes he returns because he forgot his briefcase.

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Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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