Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what's brown and sticky? A Stick

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's funny about a dying dog? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

whats the difference between an iron and a priest? An iron is a hand-held device which presses clothes and a priest is a person who is authorized to perform the sacred rituals of a religion.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is Worst than having a cancer ? Having two cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

thumb_up thumb_down -26

knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

suzy took a bath with bubbles what?......... I'm sure bubbles is a nice guy

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

DINOSAUR Street Fighter 4: Masterchief edition LOUND ONE! BAKE! And the final results: Sagat: Heh, you want some... cornflakes? *BOOO! YOU THUG!" Ryu: WHOWANTSSOMEPOUNDCAKE! *Delicious poundcake omg" "Well, at least better than serving a fucking bowl of foocking cornflakes with milk in four goddamn hours!" YOU LOSE! "You must defeat my Poundcake to stand a chance, I am the worlds greatest pillow fighter!" GAME OVER

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

thumb_up thumb_down -28

The original anti joke. What is jeopardy?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops