- Anti Joke

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -None, they will pay for somebody else to do it

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

How do you greet a small mexican man at Chuck E. Cheese? Whatsup Jose

What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

What did the man say to the woman before he had sex with her? "May I have sex with you, please?"

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

how many black men did it take to steal from the whitehouse? Obama.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

Q. What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A. A gay bar

Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only anal because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He had no arms Q: Why did the frog fall out of the tree? A: He was stapled to the monkey's face

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops