What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

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Jesus saves, passes to Moses who shoots and scores!!!

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An indian boy asked his Dad,'Why do we have such long names?' His father didn't reply, he died on the road home.

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

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a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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a man with a scar on his right hand walked in to a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x z y.

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A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

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Your Mum is soo fat.

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Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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