why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

What are three things an average teenager cannot live without? Oxygen, Food, and Water. Duh.

Two baby seals walk into a club.

if a dog won't bark, there's no way you can teach it to talk.

your face

Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

A: my name is Joe and i like onion B: ok

Mom: Uncle toms coming home from the war Jimmy: What are we going to do Mom: Bury his coffin he hit a land mine .............. Jimmy: ^O^

What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

That is so fetch

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

Q: Who was the best Jewish cook? A: Hitler.

why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...