I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

What's pink and when you press a button it turns red? A baby in a blender. What's pink and when you hit it against the wall sounds metallic? A baby with two forks stuck in its eyes.

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A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

Lewis

Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

what do friends and trees have in common? If you hit them with an axe multiple times they fall over

What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

A man walks into a bar gets drunk passes out then goes to rehab because he has a problem

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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