Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, that was a turkey. Oh.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

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When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

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Your mom is so nice.

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Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

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Your mother is so fat, she is dying due to obesity and it would be utterly disgusting to make fun of anyone in that situation.

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

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What do you call a man who eats another man? An man eater.

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A man is unemployed, ugly, short, fat, smelly and stupid. That's what she said.

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Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

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Ask me if im a tree? No

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that moment when the last few ceral are like "Come on catch me bitch"

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What do you call a blonde with great maths skills? A smart person with blonde hair.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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whats the diffrence between madeline macan and a submarine? there isnt one there both at the bottom of the sea and full of seaman

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Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

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why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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