A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

As they went down the hill Jack tripped on a rock, falling breaking many bones including his neck. In all the hysteria, Jill fell too, however she landed on a rock and now has severe dementia. This was all for a pail of water.

why did bob hit Jim Because bob didn't like Jim

It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

5 Christians, 4 Arabs, 3 Jews, and a Monkey are locked in a room with sticky bombs, hand grenades, a bible, and some bananas. What do they do? play scrabble

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

What's white and horny? a unicorn.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

When life gives you lemons you mix them with vinegar to make a drink that will help your high blood pressure.

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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