what do u tell a woman who has two black eyes? nothing, somebody already told her twice.

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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why was the man scared of the tree because it was shady

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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What did the muslim get for christmas? Nothing.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

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MORTAL KOMBAAAAAT BETA 0.3!!! DUDUDUDUDUDUDUNDUN Kano, Kano, Kano, Uh, some asian guy? Kano Kano, Kano, some black guy in the future, Kano, Kano, etc. MORTAL KOMBAAAT BETA 0.3!!!

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Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

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What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

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Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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how many toyota's does it take to pee on a soccer game 900 because isis is a cat vagina

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What did one jew say to the other? Hello.

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What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

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._____________________. Whale!

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

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Who kille the Mockingbird? George Bush: i wish i could know the answer for this question, but belive me i am thinking.

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Why the monkey fall out the tree? Cause he was dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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