What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the 11 year old boy stick his hand in a lawnmower nobody knows he hasnt come out of the coma yet

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Bob: If two negatives make a positive, what would be an anti-anti-joke? Tim: An anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A psychotic man walks into a pharmacy He buys his weekly medication to control his condition.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a man walks in to a night club he can not danse so he just wachis pepol

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats black, white, and red all over? Hot sauce on a checkerboard.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you kill a polar bear? Global Warming.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops