Most people like to drink beer, others do not.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He got AIDS and died.

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How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

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Womens basketball

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Three guys walk in to a bar. One got a concussion.

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Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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Why is John single? Because women are materialistic.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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What's black and white and red all over? A plague victim.

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Q: What does a baby look like in a microwave? A: I don't know, I don't masturbate with my eyes open.

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What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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What has eyes but cannot see? A blind man.

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King Triton: "As much as it pains me to lose you, Ariel, I want you to be happy with your prince..." Ariel: "So why don't you just turn Eric into a merman?" King Triton: "Good idea."

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What do you call 100 Americans at the bottom of the ocean? A US submarine crew.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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Forgiveness is what weaklings beg for, while redemption is what the strong succeed at.

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The only time when white and black are together When I've just taken a shit! ?ttis

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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Or something... Volume one. What do you do if you are in the jungle and get confronted by one jaguar to your left, and one tiger at the right and got only one bullet left in your gun? You shoot the Jaguar and drive home in the tiger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops