Theres two things i hate in this world... racists . . . and black people

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

3 out of 5 smokers die And apparently the other 2 become immortal

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

Why is my son hungry? Because he didn't eat lunch.

Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

Jimmy has nine bags of sugar. He eats nine bags of sugar. What doeshe have now? Diabetes

Want to hear the funniest joke in the world? I forget how it goes but it ends with the abolishment of slavery.

Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

A man gets pushed in to a pole...

1.....2.....3.....boom you died

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing he died.

want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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