roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? Being eaten by a giant octopus. What's worse than being eaten by a giant octopus? 3 Bee Stings!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

On the 1st day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . Windows 95 for my PC On the 2nd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 3rd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 4th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 5th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 6th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 7th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 8th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 9th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 9 apps a crashin' 8 megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 10th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 11th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 12th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 12 illegal operations 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC

thumb_up thumb_down -9

BIG PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's black and white and red all over? A dying zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red Babies cry Get in my bed Or you will dies

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When life gives you carrots, don't make carrot juice, because it's gross.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why are there so many anti-jokes about refrigerators? Because the writer of the joke was pressured by terrorists that would kill him if he didn't write about refrigerators.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The Sun is vital to our human existence on the Earth. It also causes cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I was once a hamster.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the Mexican jump the American border? Because he wanted a better paying job to support his family, and legal immagration to the States is a lengthy and highly difficult process.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

In Soviet Russia, life was very hard due to the failing economy and oppressive government.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock. Whos there? I am the danger! Danger who? I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worse than one beast thing? Two beast things. Whats worse than two beast things? The holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust? Three beast things.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call seven pine trees and a roll of toilet paper? Mongoloid.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops