What do you call a black person who just received a bachlors degree from Havard? A very educated human being.

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

whats black and doesnt like politics? a black chair

Why is Michael Jackson bad at the piano? Because he is dead.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

more like nig!

How do you tell if your boyfriend is gay? He is having sex with men

How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

What is white and fluffy? A cotton ball.

who is 2 chainz? no one 2 chains is just 2 chains. spelled with an "s" not a "z"

How do you cure aids? Jonathon siezed to care as he proceeded to cry when he was told his lemons were over the weight of what he'd expected

roses are red violets are blue i suck at poems i like your boobs

A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

What's the main difference between an angry white man and an angry black man? The angry black man is probably of African descent.

what did the clock say to the other clock? .. were both lawyers!

A guy walks into a bar and hears a someone crying. He asks the bartender who is crying and the bartender says "It's my goat. He's been crying since Tuesday, I'm giving a $500 reward to whoever can make him stop." So the man walks to the back and whispers something to the goat's ear and suddenly the goat starts laughing. The bartender was so amazed at what happened and says "Wow, thank you kind sir! Here's your reward money." and the man takes the money and leaves. The next day the man returns to the bar and the bartender says "Hey, ever since you made my goat laugh he hasn't stopped. He's been driving me nuts. I'll give you another $500 to make him stop." So again, the man goes to the back of the bar and whispers to the the goats ear. Suddenly, the goat start crying again. The bartender can't believe it. He asks "How in the world did you do that? What did you say to my goat?" The man says "Well the first time I saw your goat I told him a joke." "Okay, that explains why he kept laughing..." the bartender asks "Now, what did you say to make him cry?" The man replies "I told him..." Suddenly the goat escapes and goes completely crazy and kills everybody in the bar with his horns. Till this day no one knows what the man said to the goat.

Knock knock Who's there? (Punch the listner in the face)

a sabertooth walks into a club. the caveman set his trap perfectly.

How do you get a woman out of a car? You drive it into a river and her body will float to the top.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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