A man walks into a bar. He walks out 10 minutes later because he was satisfied with the new hooker he killed and made out with in the bar's bathroom.

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Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

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Why can't february march Because april may

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"Is this the Krusty Krab?" "Yes it is, how may I help you?"

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What's worse than getting arrested? getting arrested on your birthday.

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Two turtles are in a bathtub. One turtle says to the other turtle "Hey, can you pass the soap". The other turtle says "what do you think I am, a toaster?"

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What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

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A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

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A man said to his friend that he looks like his mom died. the other man started to cry due to the fact that it was acctually his dad

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? A: Cancer

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How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

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knock knock whose there? my penis.

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So a person asked a blonde in America which was closer: the Moon or Canada? The blonde responded "Canada"

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What was even more disgusting than the holocaust? Lucy's new shoes.

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One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Some home health supplies. He really needed them, too.

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When Kurt Cobain was little, his mother told him to never play with guns but I guess it went through one ear and out the other.

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Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

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How old is Batman? Old enough to be a bat.

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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