what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

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roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

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what is worst than 1 bee stings two bee stings what is worst than two bee stings holocaust what is worse than three bee stings getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

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Boy 1: Hey do you want my last chewing gum? Boy 2: Yeah please! Boy 1: Same. The boy continues to eat the chewing gum and finishes his shit wandering why the boy walked into the same cubicle as him.

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In soviet russia...the abundance of natural oils and rich agricultural land provide it with a thriving economy

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What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

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what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

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River Ravi flows in which state? Liquid state.

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Why did the fat boy cry? His grandmother died

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Batman. Batman who? Batman is stunned by the fact that there is in fact someone that does not know him.

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Why did the man slowly cross the road? He had a prosthetic leg.

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hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

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what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

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What do you call a polar bear in the desert? Bobby Marksson.

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Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

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what did the girl get with her blueberry waffles? blue waffles.

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

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Why did the black guy still have price tags on his clothes? He forgot to take them off.

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

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Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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